Fourth Child

In early October 2012, I found out that I was pregnant with our fourth baby. I cried. Seriously, I sobbed into Justin’s shoulder, telling him that I had legitimately no idea how I was going to successfully mother four children. I was in the throes of barely surviving each day with needy twin toddlers under the age of two, and trying to be there for my newly four-year-old daughter. Life seemed barely manageable. How was I possibly going to add another baby to the mix without personally self-destructing in the process?  

Justin was my greatest champion as I slowly came around to the reality, and by the time Quinn was born, I was excited and ready for this new addition to our family. I will spare you all the details, but Quinn literally came shooting out into this world and made his mark immediately. I had no idea then that this would be Quinn’s legacy in our family.

From the very beginning, Quinn was exposed to so much in this world. With three older kids in tow, and his birth falling at the beginning of Summer vacation, we had no choice but to hit the ground running with our new buddy. At three weeks old, Quinn was riding the “rocket ship” ride at Disneyland, lounging on the beach in Newport, and exploring museums in Los Angeles. I am not joking when I tell you that he lived at least half of every day in my Ergo baby carrier, only coming out to eat and for brief periods of wakefulness. When passersby would catch a glimpse of this brand-new baby, they would always ask (with almost an air of judgement), “How old is he?” After sharing his age, I always concluded with “Fourth Baby.”

Allison Gagnon- www.choicelunch.com

As Quinn has gotten older, I sometimes feel guilty about the fact that he has not only been exposed to things far beyond his years, but he’s also likely missed out on more age-appropriate experiences. For instance, at 2 years old, my oldest was spending every weekend in Music Together classes with both Justin and me. Quinn’s musical influences are best exemplified by a Facebook video I have of him singing his heart out in the car to Charlie Puth’s famous line, “Let’s Marvin Gaye and get it on…” I hate how good we are as moms at this kind of unrealistic self-judgement, because I do have a great deal of time with Quinn alone now that my three older kids are in school full-time, and use most of it to do fun and age-appropriate things with him. Mom guilt aside though, sometimes the reality is that Quinn’s world is unlike that of most of his peers. I had to laugh out loud one day when I picked him up from preschool and asked him about his morning. He responded that it was okay, but that “Mom, none of the other kids even want to talk about Star Wars with me!” I responded that, unfortunately, most of his three year old friends probably hadn’t seen Star Wars yet. Justin and I often joke that Quinn has never seen any of the quintessential Disney classics, but skipped right on over to Star Wars and Harry Potter. “Fourth Child.” We do our best to monitor his exposure by sitting him on our laps with him always reminding us, “cover my eyes at the scary parts!” Would it be more appropriate for the three year old to pass on the movie altogether? Maybe, but I am not going to lock him in the other room during our family movie night to watch Paw Patrol alone.  

Allison Gagnon- www.choicelunch.com

Because he’s our fourth and has siblings at least double his age with a sister that’s now almost 10, he’s also had so many opportunities to do amazing and fun things that are beyond his years. I believe many of these experiences are really adding to the foundation of his life. I think of the things he has seen and the places he has been, all at a young age. He’s been to countless museums, shows, concerts, and activities that are well beyond his years. He even traveled to Washington D.C. when he was 11 months old, and spent four days trekking through the National Monuments, visiting museums, and soaking up our country’s history. We walked well over 5 miles every single day, often with Quinn again in the carrier and the others trading off in the stroller and on Justin’s shoulders. He was probably a liiiiiiiitle young for this trip, but his siblings weren’t. Surely he won’t remember the ins and outs of each of these places and events, but I believe that the exposure to the world that he’s had from such a young age will serve him well.

Allison Gagnon- www.choicelunch.com

There is also one undeniable thing about Quinn’s role as our fourth: This kid is our family mascot. He has rounded out our family in ways I never knew we needed, and brought so much levity to the most stressful or serious moments. He’s focused, he’s wise beyond his years, he’s a diva, and he’s goofy. He has a heart of gold, and also a very firm opinion. Quinn is loyal, he’s slow to warm up, and he really, really has a special relationship with each one of his brothers and sisters. He’s the one thing that everyone in our family can agree on.

Allison Gagnon- www.choicelunch.com

Quinn was everything I didn’t know I needed in that moment when I sobbed into Justin’s arms and told him that there was no way I would ever be able to successfully mother four children. I didn’t know it then, but I know it now – my life wouldn’t be complete without our Fourth.

Allison Gagnon- www.choicelunch.com

 

Hello There!

My name is Allison! Nurturer Of 4 Remarkable Littles / Married To My Own Modern Day Prince Charming / California Born And Raised / Adventure Seeker / Nature Enthusiast / Memory Maker / Food / Wine / Fashion / Sleep

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